Bossque.

I dreamt of my granny 2 days ago! I cried wildly in my dream. I guess I really miss her like crazy. She took care of me for the first half of my life till I was about 9. My eyes will be lubricated whenever flashbacks flashes through my mind.

Why is it always like that? People will only realise how dear one is to you only when they pass on. Why did I bloody went out to enjoy myself every sunday when I was suppose to be there at the family gathering? "As I grow older, I naturally have more activities packed in my schedule" <- That's my bloody excuse to decive myself. I'm such an unfilial moron.

I miss the way she looked at me.
I miss the way she touches my head.
I miss the way when she says I'm guai.
I miss the way she sat on the sofa.
I miss the way she cooks.
I miss the way when she forces me to sleep.
I miss the way when she forces money into my pocket.
I miss her telling me to study hard.
I miss her kiapping the drumsticks for me.
I miss her telling me to be filial to my mum.

She always wanted me to stay over at her house BUT I BLOODY WENT HOME EVERYTIME SHE TRIES TO CONVINCE ME TO STAY OVER. I'm really hopeless. People like me don't deserve respect. No wonder the rest of the family members treated me like that. I deserve it. Damn myself. Why did I exist in the first place? Create misery for people? Piss people off? I'm a sinful fag. I don't deserve to be forgiven. I want to die, but I can't. I have a mum. She's single and I'm the only child. Dammit.

This is random but I miss the people from my uncle's company. People have been questioning me that why did I rebel from my job. I stopped working because I find my job too relaxing. I know I don't deserve to be paid that sum. People started to say things behind my back. I kept quiet. I only read mails and reply them, that's all.

However, my poor uncle is getting bullied by other companies. Everything also wanna hold my uncle responsible. Fuck them seriously. I tried my best to stop swearing but thinking of those people makes my blood boil.

Doing shipping and transporting inevitably will have minor damages one what. A little scratch here and A little hole there, they bloody send mails in to claim for money. Hello, have some common sense? The wooden pallets/cartons are fucking ment to protect the goods in it? THEY WROTE IN TO CLAIM WHEN THERE'S A SLIGHT DENT ON THE CARTON BOXES! Why don't you use plastic bags instead? Light weight = cheaper to transport what. Fucktards. Damn, I think I'm starting to sound like Xiaxue.

Anyway, the drivers also anyhow one lah. Like almost everyweek sure have accidents here and there. If I were my uncle I would've paid the claims using their salary. He's just too kind, knowing they have a family to feed. Nice people always lose out in the society eh? It's just like that. Anyway, I wrote a mail back to this assistant manager scolding her and somehow it worked. She stopped her nonsense and I'm happy.

Here are some things I wanna wish/say to my colleagues but of course they won't get to see it.

I hope Sally will recover real soon from cancer. She slimmed down alot. I hope her son did well for his O levels too.

As for Cecilia, she had minor diabetes. Conversely, she's quite naughty cuz she really likes sweet stuff alot. I saw her secretly eating cookies and stuff T.T I hope she takes good care of herself mann.

Liang had stones in his kidney. I hope he'll recover soon too.

As for LCG, he've been sitting in the office for long hours. Not cursing him, but he's really vulnerable to diseases such as diabetes due to his age. He ate like a teenager and seldom exercise. I'm kinda worried. @.@

Alan and Joanne are just too healthy for me to be worry about. Just wanna wish them all the best in life.

As for Amelia, I hope she excels in her studies in SIM. She's a lazy but bright one. Don't be so lazy lah. lol.. Also wishing her and my couz an everlasting relationship ((:

I tuitored Sherena for bio last week. She claimed that the paper was ultra easy. I'm elated. Ok I'm done with my entry. Happy belated birthday Ceed.